464: People Will Talk

I recently had an incident with another at work wherein it triggered some fears, and reactions within me towards the idea that she was 'talking bad' about me to the other co-workers. Basically imagining her explaining a situation she had with me to others, and painting me in a bad light - or 'making me look bad' essentially.

What I realized within this was that my fear of her talking bad about me to others may in fact actually happen... after-all I do see the tendency of human behavior is to gossip, or talk about others behind their back. Especially if we have a moment with another where we have our own reactions towards them... we are very quick to go and tell others our story.

Though to react to this is useless because I have no control over others. I only have control over who I am, and through time, the impression of me that is real will stand and so it's not up to me to try and get others to like me, or to see me in a certain way, and prevent them from talking bad about me. I must show who I am through a living example... as my actions, behavior, and words give the impression, the actual reality of who I am.

So yes... people will probably gossip and talk negatively about me... that is a very real possibility, as I've seen it within myself, and in others. But that cannot phase me... that cannot define who I am. To care about that is to separate me from my own self-power which is within who I am and how I live.

So let them talk. I have no control over what 'they' do. My point of responsibility and focus is making sure I am not the one participating in the gossip... showing the example that there is another way to be that doesn't define someone based on one moment with them, and carry that past moment through our words of re-living our own discontent toward them as the behavior of gossip does. Gossip is an act of abdication - wherein we place responsibility onto another person, and essentially make them less than who we are within our own minds. It is no way to act, or treat another.

People will talk. That doesn't matter. Who I am in thought, word, and deed? That is what defines each individual.. that is what defines me. That is what matters.

So a little lesson in reflecting on my own fears of someone gossiping about me. I've participated in gossip in my life (hence the fear of another doing it to me). I still see others who participate in gossip - gossip currently is an accepted part of human behavior, and interaction. Though - I do not have to accept it within/as myself. And so that is where I stand - understanding that people may talk, but that does not define who I am; I do not have to fear it. And just as I would have done unto myself, I do not allow myself to define/belittle/bad mouth/judge others through gossip.

Stand in the face of this reality - and never allow it to move you from who you really are and from what is in fact best for all.

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