At the moment I've been noticing a particular pattern/ behavior of mine flare up in a way - where I'm participating in it more and more. In the past it would then trigger judgments, and frustration because what the heck - I'm allowing this behavior when I'm in fact supposed to be changing it. Though I've seen this before.. where you are in a way working with a particular point to change, then it all of a sudden seems like you no longer have control over it, and the behavior/pattern has a mind of it's own... this has happened when I've been actually directly working on such a point with the use of Mind Constructs in the Desteni I Proccess . Mind Constructs are a specific tool which allows one to dig deep into the roots of certain behaviors... sourcing the memories of our life where we have through time created and substantiate the behaviors/patterns that are now playing out in our life. I have been working on this particular behavior that I've not
This is a continuation of a series I am currently walking: 181: The Birth of a Bully 182: The Birth of a Bully part 2 183: The Bully Character in All it's Dimensions: Memory #1 184: Bonding over Names and Shared Interests 185: What we Allow within Inferiority and Superiority 186: Seeing Equality Through Polarity & Dumping Life for Illusion 188: Who I am Within the Decision/Choice I Make So looks here we are into the physical dimension of the experience of myself in the moment of 'dumping' my friend Cristina for a desired definition of myself: Raising the tone of my voice because Cristina did not believe me - so raising my voice as 'getting more serious' so that she will understand that I will no longer be her friend I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to raise my voice tonality within frustration as the reaction to Cristina 'not getting it' wherein she did not actually believe me that I would no longer be her friend and
The other day I had a discussion with some women about femininity. It was a topic I was not initially comfortable with as I felt as if I didn't have a real point of reference on the subject... other than the fact that I am a woman. As we were moving through the discussion, I still felt like I 'didn't have the point' - like I couldn't really ground myself in our conversation because it was like this big ass question within me of 'what is femininity?' I can see some very surface programming within me of what I've defined as femininity, but I didn't have a new, fresh, grounded definition that I could really grab a hold of. What is femininity? One of the girls gave an outstanding example that really put it into context for me. She said masculinity is like planning a drive to a lake... they have the details of what time you'll leave, how long it will take to get there, what time you'll arrive. The structured, planning, already decided ro
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